St Patricks Day 2013

So what do you do on St Patrick's Day?
I know that the holiday is traditionally about trying not to get pinched,
Eating corned beef and other traditional Irish foods,
And (for many) drinking.

But for us,
We decided it would be about building the biggest and best
Green Lego Duplo house that we could.
Even Macie participated.
She had just started putting bricks together two days prior.
And the day was about drawing leprechauns, too.

It was actually a fantastic way to spend our day.

Kovar Kids on St Patricks Day 2013

Yes, even St Patrick's Day warrants picture taking fun.
And yes, my kids do think that this is fun.
They are quite the models.
And they all ham for the camera with ease in their own way,
Even the youngest.

Purple and White

One day I half-dressed Macie in an off-white onesie and left her in the care of her Daddy.  When I came back, he'd placed her on a matching blanket and placed mostly purple toys all around her.  He did not notice this, but I did... and she was being cute, so I had to take some pictures of her.  When she was 10, 11 and approaching 12 months old, she loved it when we would lay a blanket down on the floor with just a few toys to play.  Of course, we did this a lot in the months before - but it was around 10 months that she started to giggle and shake over a floor blanket because she was so excited.  And then when she became more mobile, for a long time the mere presence of a blanket would keep her in the same spot for 15-20 minutes so that I could accomplish a task.  I'm glad that we have these pictures to remember this phase.

Remembering Bouncy

Ephram loved his bouncy seat when he was a baby.
Which was good because he spent a lot of time in it every day.
Like Macie, Ephram had pretty bad reflux.
Unlike with Macie, I did not trust my mommy instincts and insist on medication.
So every time he fed for the first four or five months of his life,
I'd love him and hold him and burp him.
And kiss him.
And then I'd put him down -
In his bouncy seat.
For 20 minutes.
It was the only way that I found to prevent the projectile spit up from erupting.
And it was a bonus to watch him kick and giggle at the sight of his little woodland friends.
The kicking would start him bouncing.
And then he'd get really excited.
He was such a cute baby.
Bouncy also provided a convenient napping location in his first months.

We put Bouncy away when Ephram was done with him.
And when Macie came home, we bought a new bouncer.
She was so very tiny and I wanted one that reclined her a little more.
And Bouncy stayed right where I had prepped him for the new baby
Before the new baby decided to change things up.

When I went through my first post-Macie purge,
Bouncy was staring right at me.
My next door neighbors had just had a baby girl,
And I thought that it was time for Bouncy to get some new love.

So I pulled him out.
I washed his cover.
And came around the corner to find this.

Still in love three years later.

I swear he remembered it on sight.
Well, that might not actually be possible.
But he did seem to know that it was his and he felt a definite affinity for his woodland friends.

So I shared my plan with my son.
I told him that a little baby next door could use Bouncy for a friend.
And that she'd talk to his woodland friends, just like he did.

He was very excited,
(Which was a bit of a relief, because this attachment was a surprise to me.)

He carefully said goodbye to each of his friends.

And walked with me next door,
Proudly delivering his friends to a new little baby.
And came home still smiling.

And I'm pretty sure that little Lula loves Bouncy as much as my Ephram did.
He's a good friend,
And takes excellent care of special, sweet babies.

Macie Rides

And, to follow the last post...
A nice little happy post.

One morning in March, we put Macie up on Ephram's dino because she was begging us too.
We weren't sure how well she would be able to sit on it.
She sat perfectly!
And all of us were completely surprised when she started to move.

This started the phase of Ephram trying to coax his baby sister to ride with him.
They love each other so!

Charlie and the Ephram Gate

It was a Friday afternoon.

I, foolishly, had scheduled hair cuts for both of the boys right after Charlie got out of school for the day.

Foolishly?

Yes, three kids in a salon by myself is a bit foolish.

Especially considering the fact that Charlie is autistic and hair cuts are an ordeal for him.

And Ephram is a bit unpredictable of late.

He gets really frustrated when nobody understands what he wants.

He tries and tries to use words, 

But when nobody understands him and they move forward anyway...

It can be a bit of a disaster.

I can't imagine having the language comprehension and the imagination of my 

Three year old boy,

And still be struggling to form many of the basic sounds.

To have an idea that is perfectly reasonable,

To tell Mommy or Daddy about it,

And then to tell them again - 

And again - 

And again - 

And still not be understood.

We're talking about a boy that understands everything he hears,

Recognizes letters,

And many beginning sounds,

And is even starting to spell,

But just can't speak clearly.

So I try to be understanding,

(Patience, Dzana, patience)

And gentle,

But still...

Life must go on, right?

This particular Friday?

It was just sitting there, waiting to explode.

Charlie went first.

While he was getting his hair cut,

Ephram ran out the door,

And into the parking lot,

Three times.

Macie did not go to sleep during her usual nap time.

And uncharacteristically cried,

Pretty much the whole time.

(Two molars were pushing through her gums, poor girl!)

When Charlie was done

(And had finished screaming "You're hurting me!")

It was Ephram's turn.

And Ephram was, at that moment, trying to tell me something.

I did not understand.

I have a ton of tricks for this,

But on this day they all failed.

I tried to get his interest in sitting in one of the special chairs they have.

But he just started screaming,

And then he started crying,

And the hair started flying as he started flailing.

And I had to hold my poor boy still,

With all of my might,

While his hair was cut as quickly as possible.

(Breathe, Dzana, breathe.)

Meanwhile Macie was sobbing and 

Charlie was holding an unusual conversation with the next customer.

That customer was looking at me with a look I could not interpret.

Maybe concern?

Judgement?

Understanding?

Solidarity?

Probably just a hope that her poor one year old, 

(In for her first hair cut)

Would not freak out because of the crazy lady's children.

This, my friends, is one of the days when I wondered:

"What in the H-E-double hockey sticks was I thinking

When I decided to have three kids?"

I would be ashamed to admit this.

Except I know that all mothers secretly feel this way,
Regardless of how many children we have and what challenges we face,

And it doesn't change how much we love or care for our children.

Back in the salon,

Ephram was finally done.

Just as Charlie ran and grabbed a handful of dum dums,

Without asking and before it was time,

And unwrapped one and handed it to my not-yet-one baby,

Ephram threw up.

All over him.

All over the floor.

And all over me.

And then he did it again.

Macie was still sobbing,

As she tried to bite on the lollipop...

Which probably would have soothed her poor gums.

(Quiet voices, Dzana, don't scream.)

But then her mean, mean Mom

Grabbed it away super fast.

And the sob became a wail.

So with one overstimulated and completely crazed seven year old,

One traumatized, shaking and puke-stinky three year old,

And a screaming and spit-up covered baby in a car seat,

I waited forever while my credit card
Did not go through.

It turns out that there was some suspicious activity,

That was the monthly $3 charge that always comes through from Skype,

That I've told my bank about five times...

And so they had put a stop on my card.

(Unclench your fingers, Dzana, relax.)

Thank heaven I carried another card that day.

It finally went through,

I signed the slip as fast as I could,

With the hand that was holding Ephram on my hip.

Somehow I packed all three of my kids back in the car,

Shut the door,

And said a little prayer.

And then I started to drive.

This was almost four months ago.

If you've seen my recent pictures, you may have noticed Ephram's long hair.

You could say I'm a bit traumatized,

And more than a little worried that he may have some PTSD from the experience, too.

That hair cut will have to come eventually.

Soon.

But I'm putting it off until the last possible minute.

Because I can.

Back to our Friday.

I just wanted everyone to be happy.

And it was snack time.

So I drove through McDonald's on the way home

And gave each of my boys a chocolate chip cookie.

Yes, I use food in ways I never planned to.

I'm not ashamed of that either.

And I gave Macie a bottle and she drifted off to sleep.

I may have had a McFlurry.  

(And not the snack sized one.)

When we got home, 

Both of my boys had smiles.

And I thanked God for hearing my prayer.

As I put Macie to sleep upstairs,

My boys were a little sugar crazed downstairs,

And I returned to find them playing a new game.

We call it Ephram Gate.

When Charlie was three, he went through a gate stage.

Well, this is the day that Ephram's began.

He had the most fun blocking Charlie's path

(As Charlie counted 100 times running around our circular downstairs,)

And requiring different things for passage.

Sometimes it was a "credit card" toll,

Sometimes a magic word,

Sometimes a crazy dance.

I kid you not,

They did this for 75 minutes.

They turned my face to a smile, too...
And that headache that had been forming?
Never materialized.

I had never, ever seen them cooperate so well

Or laugh so much.

The rest of our day was - 

Wonderful.

Truly.

I will never forget this day.

Life has taught me a lot lately.

More than I've asked.

And mostly that every time I survive a disaster,

I'm immediately blessed with wonder.

So, bring on the disasters.

(But... Let's keep them manageable and minor, please?  I've had enough seriousness for a few years.  Salon disasters are far preferred to those that involve hospital stays.  Thanks.)