Oh Christmas Tree

One night before Thanksgiving I was waiting in the McDonald’s drive thru line with Lynnae in the car. Charlie was at home with Andy. While we sat in the car we were talking about random things - school, and her favorite topic of late... Ryan, the boy that she sometimes really likes and sometimes really hates. (Yes, in 3rd grade everything is already about girlfriends, boyfriends and crushes.) At a pause in the conversation I looked around the parking lot and noticed that they were starting to set-up a Christmas tree stand. So I said to Lynnae, “Look! They’re getting ready to put Christmas trees up soon!”

With the smallest sliver of hope in her voice she asked, “Will we have a Christmas tree this year?”
“Of course we’ll have a tree this year – we always have a tree! We’ll probably put up a fake tree this year, but we will definitely have a tree.”
“Okay.”

I was a little surprised at her response, until she broke the next pause in conversation with, “You know I’ve never had a tree before.”
Well, I knew this wasn’t totally true because I’d seen pictures of last year. “Yes you have! What about the tree last year?”
“Well... Yeah, there was a tree.,” she admitted. And then added in her fast 3rd grade exasperation, “But they didn’t set it up until Christmas Eve and only the parents got to decorate it. It was so unfair. I was so bored!”

Then it was time to order our food, finally. So I did and as I pulled forward I said, “Wow. Well I really need your help this year. I love Christmas so our family does a lot of decorating! I need you and Charlie to put on the first ornament and then help me get the rest on too. AND I have a special decorating job that I was going to put you in charge of.”

“Really?” She was so hyper at this point that I thought she might bounce free of the seatbelt and launch into the front seat to be closer to me. We got our food and started the drive home. Sometimes, in these moments where I can feel that she wants to be closer, I get these little stories out of her. If I sit back and am quiet enough, she will usually follow up the moment with a glimpse into her past. This night was no different. As we drove home, I heard a quiet voice in the back seat...

“You know, once when Charlie was a baby we were at the store. Daniel was trying to get into everything, it was really annoying! Mom was buying food. And do you know what she told us? She said that there wasn’t even a Santa Clause!”
“What?!?!? Why would she say that?”
“I don’t know. She looked mad. She said that parents just made it up.” I saw her shrug her shoulders in my mirror.
“And you believed her?”
“Hey!” With her most indignant voice she said, “I was just a kid!”

I smiled. We made it home and ate our McDonald’s. I didn’t say another word, I didn’t want to press my luck. But later that night, I relayed the whole story to Andy... Who thought it was as funny as I did!

A few days after Thanksgiving we erected our Christmas tree. The kids were so excited when they came around the corner and saw all the lights. Charlie and Lynnae did put the first ornament on together, although Charlie was way more interested in touching the lights and the branches of the tree. I let them put on all of the ornaments that were not breakable. They had a lot of fun! Ziggy has knocked quite a few down, but every day there are fewer on the ground. It makes me sad to know that they haven’t had the normal childhood Christmases before now... But, secretly I am really happy to be able to share these firsts with my new 8 and 3-year old kids.